Lunachicks: CHICKS ON SPEED

New York's LUNACHICKS ain't no love dolls.

BY PAUL BEARER

THE LUNACHICKS: the name says it all. Five crazed females whacked out on weed, speed and copious quantities of sugar. These gals: THEO (vocals), GINA (lead guitar), SINDI (rhythm guitar), SQUID (bass), and Howard Stern's favorite lesbian, the infamous BECKY WRECK (drums) are influenced by everything from Herschel Gordon Lewis movies to the Brady Bunch (both subjects immortalized on vinyl.)
Not averse to wearing football uniforms or pajamas onstage, the Lunachicks, however, are without a serious side. Displaying as much political savvy as they do irreverence, the Lunachicks are closely aligned with the pro-abortion organization, Rock For Choice, often playing benefits for the organization with other similarly-minded acts such as L7, Pearl Jam, and Fugazi.
The 'chicks are huge in Europe (a big hit at the recent Reading Festival), but remain somewhat overlooked and under-appreciated here at home in the States. Hopefully, their first American LP, Binge And Purge (Safehouse), and possibly another U.S. tour will accord them the accolades they deserve.
I have to admit I was slightly intimidated at the prospect of interviewing this precocious quintet, but I got my courage up and armed myself with enough candy, cannabis, and Valium to get their honest and heartfelt answers to the following questions.

SECONDS: How long have Lunachicks been together as a band?
ALL: Four years.
GINA: For ever!
SECONDS: Is it true you guys started in high school?
SQUID: Yes, we started before we were together, in 1987.
SECONDS: Legend has it that you met Sindi because she used to sell you all pot.
SQUID: No, I used to sell pot for her in high school. I was
pushing onto the pre-school class that they had downstairs.
SECONDS: You went to a drug-free school zone, is that it? Or was it a school-free drug zone?
GINA: A school-free drug zone, that was it.
SECONDS: You guys now have an album out, a double single, and various cuts on compilations which, besides the compilations, have all come out on European labels. And, from what I understand, they have fucked you over, given you no distribution at all and made your visibility practically nil.
SQUID: You got that straight! We don't really like to say we have a fuckin' album out because it's not worth buying.
SECONDS: So you're basically dissatisfied with the album, huh?
BECKI: It sucks!
SECONDS: You guys just got done in the studio recently, right? You're doing more recording?
GINA: We have a record coming out at the end of this month. It's on Safehouse Records, a small independent label out of Vermont.
SECONDS: Does it have a tentative title?
GINA: It's called Binge And Purge.
SECONDS: What I really want to ask you about and please, feel free to use any expletives...
SQUID: Thirty-four D, Paul!
SECONDS: That was coming later anyway. Are you guys as big in France as Jerry Lewis is?
SQUID: As big as Becky's dildo.
SECONDS: Becky, has your popularity waned with the cancellation of the Howard Stern Show? Have less women been throwing themselves at you?
BECKY: Hardly!
SECONDS: Let's forget about the biographical stuff since most people who are fans know that you are five women from New York who have been playing around. You did an American tour with the Dictators last year. That was your last major American tour, right?
ALL: Our only one.
SECONDS: How did it go?
GINA: It was fun, fun, fun.
SECONDS: Did you learn anything from the tour?
BECKY: We learned that it doesn't get any better. As you get older you just get ... hairier.
SECONDS: What music do you listen to when you fuck? Gina, we'll start with you.
GINA: Actually, lately I haven't been listening to any music, I don't know why.
SINDI: I listen to the bed squeak.
SQUID: Funkadelic, Black Sabbath, or AC / DC is actually the best thing to fuck to in the world!
GINA: I listen to AC/DC, too. And MC 5 is good to fuck to.
SECONDS: A lot of your songs deal with different food and candy, I know that you guys are serious candy devotees. Would you be more flattered if someone put a Whitman's Sampler at the front of the stage or a bouquet of roses ?
SINDI: I've had people throw candy at me onstage even before you, Paul.
SQUID: In England, a very thoughtful fan threw up a bunch of candy and was nice enough to throw up a couple of rolls of Tums to go with it. Now that's a true fan!
SECONDS: Besides pro-choice, do you take stands on any other political issues?
BECKY: Yeah, I'm pro-queer!
SECONDS: Do any of you work out or go to the gym or anything?
BECKY: Yeah, I give my nose a good workout every day.
SECONDS: Are any of you single or available at the present time?
SQUID: It depends on what's around the corner.
BECKY: I'm not.
SECONDS: If you had the opportunity to relocate the band anywhere in the world, would you leave New York City?
GINA: Hawaii!
BECKY: I wouldn't mind living on the West Coast for a while.
SINDI: I would use the money that they were going to give us to relocate and get a better place here.
SECONDS: Speaking of New York, what bands do you like to play with here, and who would you not play with if they offered you all the tea in China?
BECKY: I wouldn't play with G. G. Allin.
SINDI: We like to play with Vacant Lot, the Senders, Rats of Unusual Size.
BECKY: Notice I'm not saying anything.
SQUID: Murphy's Law, Into Another.
BECKY: I'd rather play with Philly bands like 3 Foot Acid.
SECONDS: I saw that Gina and Sindi got the write-up in Guitar World magazine. Was that a highlight for you?
GINA: Yes, definitely.
SECONDS: Which Darren do you prefer on Bewitched, Dick York or Dick Seargent? I personally prefer Dick York because he was always so much more frantic.
SINDI: I prefer Dick Cheese.
SECONDS: You guys are pretty popular in Canada. How does the candy there stack up against the stuff you get here?
SINDI: They have a lot of candies there that you can't get here in America. They have a good selection of English candies, and their selection of snack cakes is actually really good too.
SQUID: They do not even exist in Europe. Don't even think of trying to get a snack cake over there.
SECONDS: You guys have a song about Little Debbies. What's your favorite?
SINDI: I like Jelly Rolls.
BECKY: Pecan Twirls.
GINA: Oatmeal Cremes.
BECKY: I knew you were fucking queer, you like the Jelly Rolls! I got some jelly rolls for you, Bitch.
SECONDS: I can attest to the fact that Sindi is most definitely not queer. Do any of you actually hold responsible jobs in New York?
ALL: No. What do you call responsible?
SECONDS: Do any of you ever get confused for hookers?
SINDI: We don't get confused, we are.
GINA: We confuse ourselves for hookers.
SQUID: We confuse hookers! I confused a hooker last night, I swear to god.
SECONDS: What are you guys going to be for Halloween?
BECKY: I'm going to be every fat dyke's dream date. I'm going to be me with just my dildo on and my fat cellulite ass.
SINDI: Who was the brainiac that got you to interview us?
SECONDS: I'm beginning to ask myself that same question.

 

Article reprinted without permission from Seconds Magazine, Issue #20 . (C) 1992 Seconds Magazine

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