Here's a toast to transient youth,
 to days of beer and ways uncouth,
 to firm, rich breasts and times carefree,
 to saucy dames and ribaldry!

 Oh, I've learned to yearn the youthful quest, 
 the fanciful winks at each passing dress,
 and the way I'd climb to get the first
 glimpse at a lithesome coed's skirt.

 What blossom bloomed beneath that brassier? 
 What claims I’d claimed if I had seen her
 supple spread men always crave
 from puberty til early grave!

 But such are dreams and pipe desires.
 I have the cash, but lack the fire.
 Lust is rough and passion cruel,
 so tonight I’ll ice the family jewels.