A date is an act of bribery:
 You're paying a fee for her company.
 You're forking up bucks for her conversation,
      her wit, her charm, and her sweet inspiration, 
 and after your money is lavishly risked
 there's no guarantee that you'll even be kissed. 

 But pity the miserable lout who would dare
 to suggest that expenses be equally shared
 on a first date! I'd offer him sympathy,
      then watch him deflate with every indignity
 she'll heave upon him for the rest of the day!
 (Oh, flee! She isn't worth dating anyway!)

 A date is an act of bribery:
 You're paying a fee for her company.
 You're forking up bucks for her conversation,
      her wit, her charm, and her sweet inspiration, 
 and after your money is lavishly risked
 there's no guarantee that you'll even be kissed. 

 But pity the miserable lout who would dare
 to suggest that expenses be equally shared
 on a first date! I'd offer him sympathy,
      then watch him deflate with every indignity
 she'll heave upon him for the rest of the day!
 (Just flee! She wasn't worth dating anyway!)