A GAY HOMOSEXUAL
Lyrics by Arthur Levesque -- bs@boog.org -- http://boog.org
Inspired by Jeff Baker and Kristy Wilson
(To the tune of "Simply Irresistible" by Robert Palmer)
(And as for those swordfighting sounds in the background...)


I want a dog that always wins
He's nothing like ol' Rin Tin Tin, no no
I want a dog that's mythical
But Sparky isn't typical

He's a strange dog that's gay
Has a strange way to play
I want him to conform
Or go out in the storm
He used to look butch to me
But now I find he's
A gay homosexual
A gay homosexual

My Sparky is so powerful, huh
But he wears pink and is flowerful
This poodle here is Ooo-la-la
But Sparky has no eyes for her

Breaks the natural laws
With his limp-wristed paws
Isn't getting applause
They laugh at him because
He used to look butch to me
But now I find he's
A gay homosexual
A gay homosexual

[Chorus]
A gay homosexual
He's so gay
Let me tell you where his penis went
A gay homosexual
He's so gay
Gave that other dog a blow

He's homosexual, takes dogs from the behind
He's not the kind of dog you ever try to find
I try to love him but he's breaking nature's law
He used to look butch to me, but now I find he's

[Chorus]

Gay Al's quiche is inedible
But his place is incredible, Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
Disco and boat rides changed my mind, yeah
And now I'm glad that he is mine

Lots of critters are gay, you know gay is OK
Don't force him to conform, let us in from the storm
He used to look butch to me, but now I find he's

[Chorus, repeated and fade]